The Way You Move - Body Language [Series-I]

When I talk to people, the first thing that always reaches me are their gestures, the way they move their hands, their eyes and their body language in general even before I hear what they say..maybe just me?

I don't think so - there are a lot of people that fall into my category.Those of us who notice probably...

Don't you know people who laugh with their hands covering their mouths? haven't you shared a table with people who drum on the dining table? chatted with people who shift from one leg to another, throw their heads back while laughing, smile while they type e-mails, shake hands at every word you say, stand very close to you while talking, interject their conversation with nervous laughter, mask their sentences with false confidence by talking very loudly....so many ways...

Picking up from a wiki - the following caught my attention:

Per formal definition, is a term for communication using body movements or gestures instead of, or in addition to, sounds, verbal language or other communication. It forms part of the category of para language, which describes all forms of human communication that are not verbal language. This includes the most subtle of movements that many people are not aware of, including winking and slight movement of the eyebrows. In addition body language can also incorporate the use of other facial expressions.

-One of the most basic and powerful body-language signals is when a person crosses his or her arms across the chest. This can indicate that a person is putting up an unconscious barrier between themselves and others. It can also indicate that the person's arms are cold which would be clarified by rubbing the arms or huddling. When the overall situation is amicable, it can mean that a person is thinking deeply about what is being discussed. But in a serious or confrontational situation, it can mean that a person is expressing opposition. This is especially so if the person is leaning away from the speaker. A harsh or blank facial expression often indicates outright hostility. Such a person is not an ally, and may be considering contentious tactics.

-Consistent eye contact can indicate that a person is thinking positively of what the speaker is saying. It can also mean that the other person doesn't trust the speaker enough to "take his eyes off" the speaker. Lack of eye contact can indicate negativity. On the other hand, individuals with anxiety disorders are often unable to make eye contact without discomfort. Eye contact is often a secondary and misleading gesture because we are taught from an early age to make eye contact when speaking. If a person is looking at you but is making the arms-across-chest signal, the eye contact could be indicative that something is bothering the person, and that he wants to talk about it. Or if while making direct eye contact a person is fiddling with something, even while directly looking at you, it could indicate the attention is elsewhere.

-Disbelief is often indicated by averted gaze, or by touching the ear or scratching the chin. When a person is not being convinced by what someone is saying, the attention invariably wanders, and the eyes will stare away for an extended period.

-Boredom is indicated by the head tilting to one side, or by the eyes looking straight at the speaker but becoming slightly unfocused.

-Interest can be indicated through posture or extended eye contact.

-Deceit or the act of withholding information can sometimes be indicated by constantly touching the face during conversation/ covering the mouth while talking.

There is so much more to this topic - I'll write a series on it probably :-)

So, the next time you meet a person, eat, or talk - observe the various patterns...it is pretty fascinating.

Better still, look within yourself and see what you are conveying to the world!

An Interesting Performance

A performance I enjoyed.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-6579876666240016353&hl=en

A Beautiful Song

A song that always gives me the strength to keep going...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECmvcIiuvVs

The Burn

Last afternoon when I returned, I drove past the very person - the person who threw me and my family off a curve and now walks on the face of this earth with a false face of innocence. A look of contentment drawn from the satisfaction of belittling another human.
I did not even meet his eyes - because I still cannot accept anything else but the fact that at one time what I had seen in those very eyes was innocence and truth. And, I had trusted it...I don't want to believe the image I see today.

He has changed me and my family - changed our sentiments, our relationship and turned us into people who can never trust another human...

He has recently lost his father - we were all very sad on hearing the same. And, I had hoped that somewhere the right values in him would emerge to the forefront, and make him more human...But...

I wish that some day he has the moral courage and the dignity to come up to me and apologize for what he has to done to me and my life.

I hope one day he will realize the damage he has done...and that just by running away, the situation does not correct itself nor will become the right thing...

Till then...I'll burn in that very anger...the anger and the helplessness to do anything I can to hurt him back. I know exactly what I can, and how I can break the whole thing down...but I won't, simply because I don't want to be him...

GPS For Life?

What are people expected to do when they lose their way in Life?

People on the roads use maps
People who hike use a compass
People on the sea are guided by the winds

What do I do?

Why don't they make a GPS for Life?

Maybe there is one already that exists in some form - maybe I just don't see it....

It's All About The Time Frame

As I drove back home today - happy at some things that had crossed my life - I missed those friends I knew last year at this time. I missed sharing that happiness and sharing the laughter...

Those were some innocent moments - I so truly wish that they had stayed innocent before being corrupted by the world!

Time had changed and so had everything else..

People, friends, relationships - seem to swing to the moods of time!

I met a good buddy yesterday to catch up and while we chatted, found out how hollow she had become from the last time I met her! I was shaken up by how time had treated her.. I missed seeing her carefree, happy smile! Her life had changed. So much gone by in just a few months - gone were those dimpled smiles...

The changes brought by time seem to mock in our faces when they are positive...

Just the last week,I talked to a friend who recently lost her dear father...all she wanted was for time to turn back. A time where she could pick up the phone and call her father.A time when he would call to wish on her birthday, on festivals and on any other special occasion...

Does time touch even relationships we perceive can remain untouched? Are these out of bounds? Wrong. It does - it reaches everywhere.

I heard about our friends, a couple who had fought against all odds to get married, and were now going through separation - we went to their anniversary party just the last year around this time...how time had changed everything.

Does it end there? No.

My little one has been pestering me for a game for the last 3 months. And I had held it back so that I could bribe her when I needed to. Since her birthday is round the corner, I told her yesterday that I would be buying it for her as a birthday present. And pat came the reply - "Mumma, I'm too big for her. It's a baby game. I don't want it anymore".She didn't need it anymore. Gone was her need for it. I had held it back and had rendered it useless. Time had changed it's value...

I realized that even the most precious object, the same cause - you thought meant everything to you or the same person who was so important for you, have a limited meaning.

I also realized that they lose their meaning and the very essence of their importance when brought out of that time frame which eventually brings with it a context.

Thinking about it, everything time touches may not be in the negative sense - there's some positive too.A year ago,I didn't have the time to eat my meal peacefully...I was so busy with so many things that took precedence at that time. Music didn't mean much. But, today my world has changed. My music is my life. I live and breathe it! And it puts a smile on my face - and that is not a bad thing!

Again, like I always said - we need to appreciate and enjoy the moment while it lasts. This as I infer is the truth, as the very thing(s) may not mean the same in a different time frame....

Enjoy your time while you live in it.

Sending positive thoughts your way...